Monthly Archives: February 2019

Run at fear – with praise and thanksgiving!

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Facing fear exposes it. All day yesterday, I struggled with anxiety, painfully unlearning the wrong way and relearning the right way to respond to fear. When I got to work, I knew I felt anxious but I kept vaguely thinking about it all day long. I remembered several times to quote a Scripture but fearful thoughts popped up repeatedly, thoughts like “You are never going to be really free of fear, your health is getting worse, your finances . . ..”

As evening approached, I was weary and still thinking about (and thus feeling) the fear. Yuk! All day long, that stinking fear had dived back into the depths of my thoughts, like some oversize fish running around the bottom of an aquarium stirring up all the dirty stuff hidden by gravel. Because I had not clearly identified fear and exposed it, it had grown.

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What you focus on grows. Thinking about something grows it, as surely as water grows plants (or weeds!). For most of yesterday, I repeated a mistake made for many months. I actually meditated, or pondered, the fearful, negative thoughts, and they had grown. Yuk again!

Identify the negative then run at it!  One technique I learned during group counseling was to be mindful of, or to face, negative feelings, rather than automatically running from them and then doing something to numb the emotion. It is like David running at the giant Goliath. (I Samuel 17:1-54).

For me, as a believer, facing fear means stopping to talk to God about it. So, this morning when I got up and began to feel shaky again, I prayed:

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“Dear Father, I confess I am feeling afraid again. Please forgive me if I have done something to cause this fear and show me how to change it. Yet, I know You died so that I might have a blessed, joyful, wonderful life (John 10:10), so I thank You for that, Lord! I praise You that You have made the way to conquer all my problems. Lord Jesus, You said I will have problems in this world but I am to rejoice and be happy because You have overcome the world! (John 16:33) Thank You, Lord, for teaching me how to have right thoughts. Thank You for helping me meditate on Your word. Thank You that I can go to the gym this morning, be friendly, pray silently for everyone I see and know my prayers make a difference. Thank You for enabling me to exercise and keep my earthly tabernacle healthy, thank You, Lord . . . “

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Two powerful spiritual weapons: (1) Praise, and (2) giving thanks. God inhabits the praise of His people. Psalm 22:3 tells us that God is “. . . enthroned on the praises of Israel.”(NLT) God is with us when we praise Him. What a privilege! I believe one reason God tells us to praise is that when we talk about how powerful and loving and faithful God is, it reminds our human minds of truths that our all too human flesh tempts us to forget.

And in First Thessalonians 5:16 God tells us to “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” (NLT).  When we choose to trust that God has good plans for us even when our circumstances seem hard, it makes a powerful statement in spiritual realms.

Long-standing problems can be overcome.  In learning from my mistakes, God is mercifully training, or disciplining, me (Please, please study Hebrews 12:6-13!) He is training me because He loves me and wants to “ . .  strengthen and harden me to difficulties” (Isaiah 41:10).

Truly, as the song says, He is a good, good Father!

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No matter how it seems

No matter how it feels, no matter how it seems

God has given grace to shatter Satan’s schemes.

No foe can fight against you, no enemy arise

That can stop God’s mighty warrior, eyes fixed upon the prize!

Press on! By grace, in faith, pursue!

Let God complete His work in you!

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No matter how it seems. When I wrote that 11 months ago, I thought my struggle with depression must surely be nearly over. However, I did not start climbing out of that pit for another nine agonizing months. I learned the truth of Isaiah 54:17: “But no weapon that is formed against you shall prosper . . . “ I grappled under a dark and heavy cloud for many months. Although it seemed hopeless, God came through as I kept trying to do my part. I use the word try to emphasize that I usually did not feel I was succeeding.

No foe will succeed. During those months, Proverbs 2:7 reassured me: “He holds victory in store for the upright, He is a shield to those whose walk is blameless, for He guards the course of the just and protects the way of His faithful ones.” (NIV). Well, it did not feel like I was on my way to victory! But feelings and circumstances do not matter. What matters is truth. One blessed truth is:  God promises victory if we live upright, blameless lives. And if we press on!

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Fix your eyes on the prize! (Philippians 3:13-14) I did not understand why the darkness seemed to deepen but I held to the truth that God loved me, I kept seeking God for help, and, I did everything He showed me. With hindsight, I see that I was standing firm in the Lord and keeping my eyes focused on Jesus. (Please pause to ponder Philippians 3:1 – 4:1).

God will complete what He begins. The apostle Paul writes that he is thanking God for the believers at Philippi because he was “ . . . confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus (Philippians 1:3-6, NIV) That is another verse I white-knuckled. God repeats that thought in Psalm 57:2 “I cry out to God Most High, who fulfills His purpose for me.”

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Hold fast to His hand. Dear friend, no matter what you struggle with, hold fast to His truth and press on with your life, leaning your entire heart upon Him. His mercy and loving kindness are with us “. . . in proportion to our waiting and hoping for Him.” (Psalm 33:22, Amplified Classic)

Studying Security – Part One

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Feeling secure . . . feeling loved. As I steadily walk further away from that pit of depression and anxiety, I need mega doses of the security, love and peace God promises in Psalm 91.

            “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty [Whose power no foe can withstand]. I will say of the Lord, He is my Refuge and my Fortress, my God; on Him I lean and rely and in Him I [confidently] trust.” (Psalm 91:1-2, Amplified Classic)

            Stable and fixed. “Hmm, stable and fixed” I pondered as I read.  Hmm . . . notice the chain of thought in Psalm 91. The priceless promises of provision and safety are conditional. Verses 3 and 4 say then God will deliver us, then He will cover us. Verse 9 says because we make God our refuge and make Him our dwelling place, or our home, and verse 14 says because we set our love upon Him. Please study Psalm 91 for yourself in the Amplified Classic Version (available free on line at Bible Gateway and other websites) or another translation of the Bible – but study!

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I recently told my counselor that, although the medicine has greatly helped, the biggest reason I am so much better is time in the Word and meditating on it throughout the day. Each morning, I study the Bible—for myself!–for help in areas like finding peace, feeling God’s love, and overcoming fear. In studying the Word and pondering it all day, I am making God my home, the place where I am secure and the place where my needs are met.

Study for yourself. And I am going directly to the Word now and trusting Holy Spirit to speak to me, rather than relying on other people’s teachings. 

I read slowly, using the Amplified Version, and talk to the Lord about it. I look up cross references, and most days I write a passage in long-hand and carry that around with me all day, repeating the phrases to myself. This has now, praise God, become a habit. Out of His mercy and goodness, God is renewing my mind (Ephesians 4:23) I am so grateful to Him!

I always read the Bible and studied it, but for a while I lost the self discipline to study it. I also lost the self-discipline to do much reading outside the Psalms. No wonder my spirit became so weak and my mind such easy prey for the enemy’s thought arrows! 

Having the Word in my mind all day is one way God is showing Himself to be that “ever present help in time of trouble.” (Psalm 46:1)

Obedience brings blessing. I am finding as I continue writing, that God has some definite things He wants me to say to you, including sharing my failures and sins. (James 5:16) Being so vulnerable is challenging, but I want to help you and . . . I want to stay free!

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What things are you thinking about?


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Four a.m. ideas. Two hours before the tinkly melody of my phone alarm would sound. I lay awake, like a child on Christmas morning, thinking about the afternoon ahead with my grandsons. After pickup from school, I would bring my five-and-a- half and seven-year-old delights back to my home for a comic party, their latest creative idea for which they had prepared all week at their own home. They did not know I had planned two games of my own invention and decorated my tiny home with balloons and streamers.

            Though my hip and feet ached a bit, I smiled as I pulled the quilt to my chin. Then, a gentle thought: “You are happy now because you are “thinking on good things”

            “Thank You, Lord, yes, Phillipians 4!”

            For the preceding many months of depression, early morning awakening had meant hours of lying sleepless in the dark, my sluggish mind tormented by cycling fears and fretting. Daily, this has improved.

            Prompt obedience. I smiled into the darkness. “Thank You, Father, thank You so so much!” I took my mussed hair, unwashed face and uncoffeed mind straight to the computer, stopping only to feed my beloved Barny cat.

            My loving Heavenly Father was, again, guiding with tender pats on my head. I recognized an idea for a blog post when I had one! He had awakened me yesterday with an idea, too, but I had begun my morning routine before I sat down to type. And the post had not been written. However, God is rich in grace and mercy, so . . .

Yesterday’s pondering passage had been I Corinthians 8:3: “But if one loves God truly [with affectionate reverence, prompt obedience, and grateful recognition of His blessing] he is known by God [recognized as worthy of His intimacy and love and is owned by Him.] Notice the verse says prompt obedience. . . And my Bible reading last night had included Genesis 18, where Abraham had RUN to show hospitality when the Lord appeared to him.

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            The word of God is alive (Hebrews 4:12) and it had borne fruit in my spirit. This morning, I promptly obeyed God.

            Trust . . . and God will be with you! My life verse is Proverbs 3:5-6. After 37 years of walking with my beloved Father, I am understanding, a little. The previous day at work had included many moments of struggle with insecurity, but I had consistently—by His great grace—pondered I Corinthians 8:3 and tried to do every little task for Him and in His presence. And when I came home, I had prayerfully worked a bit more on blogging tasks, all the while still not feeling so good.

            When your ways please the Lord. God is blessing as I try to write for Him and His kingdom’s sake, with: wakeup calls via blog post ideas; the renewal of my mind; and a more balanced, connected life. “When a man’s ways are pleasing to the LORD, He makes even his enemies live at peace with him.” (Proverbs 16:7, New American Standard Bible.)

            I am faaaar from perfect, dear  friend, but God is rewarding my baby steps to serve Him. He longs, earnestly, to do the same for you!

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God loves you – earnestly!


Anxiety knocked. Don’t you love it when God speaks to you through events as clearly as if you could hear His voice with your physical ears? Anxiety kept knocking at my door today, but I resisted, cast my cares on God, and kept truths about God’s love and protection cycling through my brain whenever I was not actively engaged in other things.

Today, those other things included being at work, where the future existence of my job has been uncertain for months now. Once home, I made a long-dreaded call to a repair person and we fixed my problem over the phone. Although I had thought it would cost two hundred dollars minimum, God worked it out for free!

God showed up! And, the repair person was a believer! In the gaps while the computer was processing my information, I mentioned something about God and got a positive response. We chatted briefly about our favorite hymns and where we were in our daily devotions. I hung up the phone and whooped so loud I startled my cat! I had prayed late in the day for God to reassure me of His presence, just because I needed it. And He did!

As you will soon hear on this blog, I recently sensed God directing me to share my experiences with overcoming depression and anxiety now, rather than waiting until I feel I have it all together. This post is the first step of obedience about that.

Stay in the present moment, with your mind on God. I woke up this morning with the start of a poem: “Stay in this day; don’t fret His gifts away.” I see now that God was lovingly telling me how to have victory today. By His grace, I did focus on Him and I did do my work as if unto Him; therefore, when I came home I had a calm and grateful spirit, I was excited over the call about the repair and I wanted to write this post. God is soooooo good ALL the time!

Fight the good fight and earnestly believe the truth of these verses in Isaiah 30:15 and 18 (Amplified Classic version)

(v. 15) “For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: In returning [to Me}, you shall be saved; in quietness and in {trusting} confidence shall be your strength. . . (v. 18a) And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking, and longing} to be gracious to you and show loving-kindness to you. . . “

Did you catch that? God earnestly waits and longs to be good to us . . . if we will just trust Him! The One whose hand formed the mountains longs to abide with you and me. Ponder that!