Monthly Archives: November 2015

Grateful in the Face of Setbacks

I knew something was up as soon as I saw the envelope addressed to me in my own handwriting.I held it up to the fading sunlight and saw the postcard, a form rejection notice from a prospective publisher for my children’s book.

“Thank You, Father, that You put it in my heart to gather a list of possible publishers when I first sent this off.  It will go right back out, tomorrow, to the next one on the list.”

The full day had brought on fatigue.  I was up at 5 a.m. to write, then to my daughter’s to pick up my four year old grandson at 8:00, then to three stores for quick errands, then to the gym where he had exposure to other kids in a daycare setting while I did the grueling workout necessary to keep the weight at least stable, then my daughter’s home again, in time for Mom to wipe him down and put him in a fresh shirt for nap, then an hour and a half alone time with my two-year old grandson and, finally, one blissful hour of lying down for a nap, snuggling with the pure sweetness and innocence that is a sleeping toddler.

When I got up, a voice mail from my veterinarian said to take my panicky Tonkinese back in for one more ear packing.  Each visit traumatized Barny so much he hid for an entire day in the closet.

Thank You, so very much, dear Father, for sending another Tonkinese, the only mink one listed with the Texas Tonkinese Rescue program.  He could be my beloved Thellie’s twin.  And thank You for sending him several months before Mom passed.  Cuddling him is such a comfort when the tears come.  Thank You for an understanding veterinarian and her staff.  Thank You that he is healthy.”

“Thank you, Father, for the privilege of writing this blog, showing my spiritual failures and all.  Please help it help others.”

Though it was 33 years ago, I remembered precious early evening times with Sharon.  In fall and winter, we got home just before dusk fell.  We talked about the evening news while I cooked and then as we ate dinner at our card table in the tiny kitchen.  Twilight, I guess, will always be my favorite time of day for that cherished reason.

Thank You for teaching me then to be grateful for all things, even in the midst of setbacks and hard times, no, especially in those times.   You keep my attitude healthy and keep me close to You.  Thank You for training me to be aware of complaining.  Please continue reminding me to take time to thank You for blessings as countless as the stars in the velvet sky.  You’ve truly showered blessings  over me and Sharon and  her family.  I love You, Lord. . . so much!!”

Say “Thank You” . . . while you can

A man who was my mentor, a good friend, and my boss for seven years passed away this week.  I sent a  card, but I desperately wish I had called to tell him thank you, one more time.  He was an important influence in my life and was the reason I chose to pursue a Ph.D. in Educational Research and Measurement.

He was my first professor  in graduate school, and he helped me see statistics was not so hard after all, which was a game-changer for me.   He was in charge of the department with which I did some contract work after graduation before eventually being hired full-time.

I looked at  the beautiful video of his obituary through tears.  I saw photos of him as a young boy, teenager, new husband, new father, then pictures of times with his wife and their two girls as the girls grew up, got married, and had children of their own.  There were so many touching photos of him with his grandchildren, and the joy on his face was so very evident.

The video began and ended with scenes of the ocean, gentle waves washing into the shoreline, then receding back to their source.  He had loved the water, and lived near it, all his life.  The last photo was a shot of him standing on the balcony of his home on the water, waving.

I had told him thank you many times during the years he was my professor and then my boss.  But I so wish I had taken just five minutes out of my busy days to say thank you and to remind him of how much he had shaped my professional life.

What a lesson for me – to grab each chance to express appreciation and love to those around me.  Life, as the Bible says, is indeed like a mist that vanishes in an instant.  Our days on this earth are so short.

Dear Father,

Please help me to give more of my time and my heart to showing love to others.  Help me seize each opportunity to express the love You put into my heart for other people, whether they are in good health or not.  Forgive me for not reaching out one more time to say thank you to my mentor and friend.  Comfort his family and his other friends and colleagues, and turn their thoughts toward eternity.  I love you Jesus.  Amen.

“It is Well with My Soul”. . . that (sometimes elusive) attitude of gratitude

Most days, I feel upbeat and find pleasure in so many, many  things throughout the day.   BUT. . . some mornings, even before coffee and devotions, my thoughts turn to finances, little physical challenges that come with age, frustrations of getting both websites to work right, yada yada yada. . . blah, blah. blah.   So go the attacks of the enemy of our souls!

Literally counting my blessings never fails.  I set my heart to be grateful, to trust God, and be consciously aware that God:

  • is in control of each moment of my life,
  • He planned every day of my little life since before time began,
  • His love for me, personally, is “as high as the heavens are above the earth”, and
  • He has “separated my sins from me as far as east is from west” (see Psalm 103, New International Version)

If I just begin that process,

  • I get my attitude of gratitude back,
  • I remember that worry shows I am trying to control the future rather than trusting God,
  • His peace settles in like a soothing, gentle rain as I focus my thoughts on how powerful and loving and forgiving and kind and patient and gracious and long-suffering He is with all of us.

So often, the melody and words of that cherished hymn “It is Well with My Soul” then float into my heart.

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,

When sorrows like sea billows roll;

Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Chorus:  It is well. . .  with my soul. . . it is well, it is well, with my soul.

(Broadman Hymnal, 1940, page 73)

Even if you, for whatever reason, have never sung the old hymns of the church I urge you to get a copy of the Broadman hymnal (available on Amazon) and just read the verses of this and other hymns.

To hear the unbelievable but true story behind “It is Well with My Soul”,  see this link https://search.yahoo.com/search?fr=mcafee&type=C211US0D20140807&p=story+of+it+is+well+hymn

Dear Father in heaven,

Please help me keep my focus on You and Your love.  Help me share Your love with others, that they may know Your marvelous love for them individually.  Help me explain Your desire and Your power to comfort and restore broken lives, no matter how deep the tragedy or loss.  Amen.

Getting back up on that horse!

Well, it’s been too long since I posted.  I have to admit I was thrown for a loop when I learned I had my website and book site set up all wrong.  It has taken me a while to get back in the saddle. (Plus our family shared a cold, over and over, for a week and a half – yuk!)  So, even though I know better, I got discouraged to the point of paralysis!

But, praise God, getting stuck in feelings is always temporary now!  God does little HUGE miracles to lift me out of that old pit of fear and self-pity .  So, I am revamping part of this site and transferring the book “Unjealous Heart” to the website called unjealousheart.com.  FYI, it took more than a hour with the great support folks at Godaddy.com to get the changes done.

You may subscribe to the blogs of this book for free now.   Just visit unjealousheart.com and sign up.  Or, if you don’t want to receive posts in your email, just log in to the site and read the latest post that way.

Either way, please do share your thoughts with me!  Hopefully, this will one day be a print book, and I want the final version to be maximally useful and on target.  You can help tremendously with that by telling me honestly what you like and do not like and what you want to see that I have accidentally left out.

In so many ways I feel like it is 30 years ago and I am just starting to learn about writing.  I am at the beginning of another steep learning curve with having a website and how to do “marketing” – NOT my kind of thing!

But the wonderful thing is that the loving God who taught me how to write is the same One who is still teaching me.  And I still have the same peaceful but terribly excited feelings I did 30 years ago as I work in a tiny apartment so similar to the one Sharon and I shared for seven years.  Our God is far beyond awesome!